Sunday, June 22, 2014

Weekend Writing Warriors 6/21/2014: Breaking your promise, now this!

Hello everybody J Happy summer, at last! Thanks for coming back, even when I don’t post consistently! I’m continuing with my Draft 1 work-in-progress, tentatively titled Night Shift although I’m skipping ahead just a bit. Kazimir has the demon Thaumiel trapped in the basement of a synagogue. Kaz has made it clear he wants to destroy the demon as payback not just for the death of Devorah’s dad, but the death of Kaz’s wife as well. Devorah has interrupted Kaz as he was about to stab the demon which would have broken Kaz’s promise to her to see justice done for her father’s death. Kaz agrees that Devorah is right when she says turning Thaumiel over to the angels would be a better punishment than simply destroying him.

Thaumiel’s on his back on the floor, with Kaz straddling his chest holding a dagger. Devorah is next to Kaz, having thrown herself against him to stop him from stabbing the demon. Collected excerpts for this story are here. Kaz speaks to his prisoner at the start of this excerpt.
“Know that you would be consigned to oblivion were it not for the truth. An eternity spent in the Light will be far more painful for you. My heart rests.” 

“Fool, you will be betrayed!” Thaumiel ranted. “Your suffering will surpass mine!” 

“It already has.” Kazimir drove the dagger into the demon’s chest.

An electric shock ran through me—he just said he wouldn’t do it! 

Thaumiel howled loud enough to echo, straining to move. Around me, a quiet rumble got louder; I looked up to see some sections of the walls were missing plaster, and cracks blossomed sideways deep into the walls.

Uh oh, somebody’s in trouble now J For excerpts from more stories than you can shake a stick at, visit Weekend Writing Warriors.  I guarantee you’ll find two or three or several stories you just have to follow! On an unrelated note, did you know that parakeets can get arthritis in their jaws? That’s what my veterinarian told me when I took Herschel in to have his beak trimmed. Sometimes they get arthritis and that’s why they stop chewing on things like cuttlebones that normally keep the beak in good shape. Huh! Learning all the time.

12 comments:

  1. This is fraught with suspense and I'm sorry I haven't kept up with the story. Great excerpt, Marcia! ☺ Interesting info about the parakeets. Here's hoping Herschel (cool name!) doesn't suffer from the beak arthritis.

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    1. Thanks Debbie. It's always good to see you :) Herschel's a sweetie, he never bites. I'll tell him you're thinking of him!

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  2. Wow, always twists and turns in this story and a LOT of deep emotion. Can't wait to see what's next, terrific snippet!

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    1. Aw thanks so much. Gotta keep these characters on their toes!

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  3. Clever of Devorah to suggest an even worse fate than getting merely killed, but that's a tough argument to sell to someone intent on immediate gratification. So Kaz has killed the demon anyway...or has he? I'm not so sure...

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  4. Uh oh, the future isn't looking too bright right now. I had no idea that birds got arthritis in their beak area, though now that I think about it, it makes sense. Is there any kind of pain reliever that can be given to birds?

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  5. Formidable event is taking place. You nailed the scene. Good job!

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  6. Oh, great action scene and dialogue! I'm intrigued to read more.

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  7. Not sure of the rules of your universe, but isn't revenge more demonic than angelic?

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  8. Yeah...all the questions posed in earlier comments?? Is Thaumiel really dead, or is this just the beginning of his suffering... ?
    Intriguing 8!

    Poor Herschel. I had no idea. :-(

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  9. Oh wow. He just couldn't stop himself...what the heck is gonna happen now???? I'm loving this story Marcia!

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  10. Sometimes, emotion gets the better of you. Unless there is something here that she doesn't understand, and that wasn't a killing blow somehow.

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