tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post3556461722972348572..comments2023-03-29T08:47:59.677-04:00Comments on Letter Go: Weekend Writing Warriors 3/23/14Owlladyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12989152304836466124noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-67855281523855495132014-03-23T21:58:09.471-04:002014-03-23T21:58:09.471-04:00Sue Ann, it's not clear in this snippet, but l...Sue Ann, it's not clear in this snippet, but lightning ignited the trees, then the demon showed up. He is fire-attuned, meaning he has control over it, so he augmented what the lightning started. It makes more sense in the full scene. It's nice to see you!Marciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07092928480361131154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-71532457084956965382014-03-23T21:55:36.168-04:002014-03-23T21:55:36.168-04:00Hi Charmaine. Yup, I expect a lot of stuff will ge...Hi Charmaine. Yup, I expect a lot of stuff will get incorporated into the next draft. The excerpts are always tweaked and tidied for WeWriWa, but even so, it's still first draft. Marciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07092928480361131154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-81141283590381529242014-03-23T21:54:06.266-04:002014-03-23T21:54:06.266-04:00Hey Pete, thanks for coming by. Adrael was nearby ...Hey Pete, thanks for coming by. Adrael was nearby anyway, but you can bet Devorah is especially glad he showed up.Marciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07092928480361131154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-26969148856744558222014-03-23T21:52:49.254-04:002014-03-23T21:52:49.254-04:00Aw thanks bunches. Polly's almost as nasty, th...Aw thanks bunches. Polly's almost as nasty, though :D Marciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07092928480361131154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-338479659115423902014-03-23T21:52:05.504-04:002014-03-23T21:52:05.504-04:00I'm so glad you like this one. Adrael is so co...I'm so glad you like this one. Adrael is so convenient, I may have to shake things up so me and the characters don't rely on him too much .... :)Marciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07092928480361131154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-41201712353825925222014-03-23T21:48:58.197-04:002014-03-23T21:48:58.197-04:00Millie, that's more of what I had in mind. It&...Millie, that's more of what I had in mind. It's not real clear in a snippet this short. I'm glad you came by today :)Marciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07092928480361131154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-88797590511788167802014-03-23T21:47:55.763-04:002014-03-23T21:47:55.763-04:00Well, this bit is lacking the impact of the full s...Well, this bit is lacking the impact of the full scene. The trees all around where Devorah is standing are now on fire. Thaumiel is a fire-attuned demon, and he knows fire scares the crap out of humans, so he would make a big show. Once I finish this draft, I'd love to have a few people read it all the way through. Some things would be much clearer then.Marciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07092928480361131154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-377841904877967492014-03-23T21:44:55.501-04:002014-03-23T21:44:55.501-04:00Hi Veronica! Yup, draft one stuff. And I forgot to...Hi Veronica! Yup, draft one stuff. And I forgot to mention that the excerpt is condensed and tweaked a bit to fit into eight sentences. But I'm pleased that you like it :)Marciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07092928480361131154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-55080438116789876982014-03-23T21:43:09.479-04:002014-03-23T21:43:09.479-04:00Thanks Chelle. It's nice to see you!Thanks Chelle. It's nice to see you!Marciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07092928480361131154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-40490955270329317842014-03-23T15:50:50.879-04:002014-03-23T15:50:50.879-04:00Did the demon's fire start a forest fire?Did the demon's fire start a forest fire?Sue Ann Bowlinghttp://homecomingbook.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-2937260113099908262014-03-23T15:13:13.502-04:002014-03-23T15:13:13.502-04:00Good solid critique here. Heed the advice. Good ei...Good solid critique here. Heed the advice. Good eight with a bit of trim. Definitely other worldly.Charmaine Gordonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15236373312231763983noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-62815625460935687212014-03-23T14:26:37.782-04:002014-03-23T14:26:37.782-04:00Good thing Adrael was visiting from the first heav...Good thing Adrael was visiting from the first heaven.Smu Doodlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14709677949920355173noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-40371235123154148642014-03-23T13:08:07.684-04:002014-03-23T13:08:07.684-04:00Excellent. Love the dialogue and your use of words...Excellent. Love the dialogue and your use of words are other worldly. I can visualize the scene. Scary stuff!<br /><a href="http://historysleuth.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow">The Murders of Polly Frisch</a>HistorySleuthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05502098938801373264noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-28251404759563865942014-03-23T12:58:20.626-04:002014-03-23T12:58:20.626-04:00Scary snippet! Powerful and thank goodness for Adr...Scary snippet! Powerful and thank goodness for Adrael!gemma parkeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06275261646534324484noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-49392458611236760932014-03-23T11:24:36.251-04:002014-03-23T11:24:36.251-04:00Hmm, I understand what Teresa's saying, but if...Hmm, I understand what Teresa's saying, but if the demon shot up...his fire and sparks would rain down...I dunno. This eight is very intense, and I'm glad Adrael showed up when he did!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05551671528722336812noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-77287391786540957902014-03-23T11:16:59.940-04:002014-03-23T11:16:59.940-04:00I sure do like Adrael! I'd like a protector li...I sure do like Adrael! I'd like a protector like him. This is a frightening moment in the book, I think.<br /><br />How big was the display of sparks and fire--since this is only draft one? This is the visual I had--a very small "shower" like a small display of fireworks that you'd light and then toss by hand into the yard. Is that how you meant it? And I can't picture a Teresa Cypherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08940430996766842518noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-16088372358367520412014-03-23T11:12:37.041-04:002014-03-23T11:12:37.041-04:00Dramatic! I'd say she was fortunate...since it...Dramatic! I'd say she was fortunate...since it's draft one, teeny nit: I wouldn't use the word "back" twice in one sentence...but surely can't wait for more of this fascinating story.Veronica Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04732940088047026021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1361240553573022287.post-79414381032865944802014-03-23T03:31:33.292-04:002014-03-23T03:31:33.292-04:00I would definitely want an angel protecting me if...I would definitely want an angel protecting me if I had to face a demon. Worried about her inability to breath. Good tension.Chelle Corderohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15412268726863698528noreply@blogger.com